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Tuesday, October 28, 2008

my father.

today i learned that my father passed away yesterday.

i don't know if a blog is an appropriate place to commemorate people, but i figure it is as good as anywhere - especially if it makes me feel any small amount of better.

among myriad things, my father has always been unendingly supportive of me, my creative endeavors, my choices in life and my freewheeling lifestyle. he had actually been following this blog for quite a while while i travelled. my dad (both my parents, in fact) put my happiness before any pressure for me to achieve fame or fortune. he supported even some of my wildest creative ideas. he let me push him beyond things he had considered before - being interviewed for trampoline hall lectures about my family in the spring, coming to queer film festivals to see movies i was in. my father was very central in letting me feel permission to be who i am, do what i do and live how i live. he was proud of me for artistic undertakings that other parents could understandably have found pointless and confounding. for all these things i am hugely thankful.

above is possibly the last picture i took of him. it was from this past july when aitor and i went to visit. he has purchased some fake colour contacts and went through a phase of switching the eye he would wear one in to confuse acquaintances on the island where he lived. i think it's pretty clear that his legacy lives on in me.

bye, teejay. i miss you already. i wish we could go fishing again together, even if we didn't catch anything.

15 comments:

foobella said...

I'm very sorry about the passing of your father, but what a wonderful tribute to him.

Peace.

shannongerard said...

becky-- i'm so sorry to hear about your dad's death. i love you!

Jill said...

Sad news, indeed. Love from Minneapolis.

kelly said...

I've been following your blog since I met you at Renegade in SF a few months ago...

Just wanted to stop in and say that I'm so very sorry for your loss. Your post is a beautiful tribute.

sweetie pie press said...

thank you, guys.

for some reason, i was worried that a blog post would be crass or something. but then i remembered how much he used to like reading it.

Mrs. Ryan said...

Hey there, Faythe introduced us @ Poketo at the auction. Been subscribing to the blog since. So sad to hear your news. XOXO

stephanie said...

oh, my dear, i'm so sorry. i am thankful for him too -- you are wonderful. we all send love and thoughts your way. here's a big internet hug for you: ]]]][[[[
bunches and bunches, stephanie

Serena Marie said...

Oh dear, Becky!
My heart goes out to you...

Anonymous said...

becky, i am thinking about you!
shauna

Erkuden Sakana said...

I am sure he would have loved your words and your choice of venue, Becky. Actually, I am sure he knew you felt like this about him. I( hope the two of you are feeling a bit better. Love. Amatxo.

papernstitch said...

I am so deeply sorry to hear about your father's passing.

Church of Craft Athens said...

We are thinking of you, Becky.

Shannah said...

That is an absolutely beautiful photo of your father (and I love the contact story too).

I think the stars in the sky might be plotting against us. You have my warmest wishes Becky. Lots of love to you both.

sweetie pie press said...

well, that's the trouble with being long lost twins.

Emma said...

hi becks. thinking about you lots. come home soon for tea and hugging and stories.
xoxoxox
emma