an antithetical outing.

i know this whole blog, our whole tour and my whole life are supposed to be about independent creativity, but when in rome one is wont to do what the romans do. and a trip to edmonton without experiencing "the world's biggest mall" (a claim i feel must be obsolescing to some new development in dubai) is a crime against all things industrialist/albertan. also, aitor had never been to west edmonton mall before and was told by our friend taz that you can shoot guns there...somewhere. for my own part, i wanted to buy some new underwear (with all apologies to indie crafters, y'all have yet to make a panty that can rival my old reliables).

aitor was ready for action and adventure, i was braced for the throngs of doughy teenagers and we set out on our voyage. a quick and surprising discovery about west edmonton mall is that it is littered with old-style photo booths (a great love of ours) in both colour and black and white. i guess west edmonton mall is just large enough to have bought/leased a bunch of these things but just outmoded enough to have kept them instead of replacing everything with cutesy japanese sticker machines.

we went for the black and white; they are getting harder to find.

i was planning on submitting a listing to this site i recently found that is aiming to catalogue photo booths worldwide. but when i got back to our dorms i realized i had broken some of their submission guidelines. i regret nothing! aitor's sock-gartered calves look the best in that booth.

this and buying my underwear comprised the high points of our trip.



aitor and i both immediately got the "shopping with mom" feeling that malls give us; we were (well, aitor was) getting gawked at by teenagers with faces full of metal and plastic bags sewn into their hair; and i experienced a pang of depression when i realized that there are sharks living under the mall in what can't amount to more than a hole in the prairies. but aitor did get to have an orange julius for the first time. oh, malls. what a bad place to vacation.

an open letter.

...to the douche bag who ran into my car while i was teaching at the theatre:

you obviously hit my car pretty hard. you must have noticed and then you just left. i feel your lack of personal responsibility will now begin to bleed into all parts of your life at an increasing rate. aside from the damage to your own car, i foresee a trend in your life away from deep connections with others. your family will grown disdainful of you and those you love will never trust or admire you enough to foster a reciprocal relationship. you will live a very long time and watch this process unfold before you until at a final arduous moment, all your errors will shine clearly into your mind and soul. this is the feeling you will spend eternity inhabiting.

your friend,

becky

blackout.

my laptop failed me yesterday and now needs repair.

i mention this in case any family members (mayte, that means you) are concerned about the radio silence on this blog.

we are well and happy and fed in edmonton and plan to continue in this manner for some time. i am here performing with and without other people at improvaganza while aitor keeps quite busy with nightly unflattering portraits of drunken comedians and other illustrative work.

i would also like to congratulate aitor on having his live stage debut today. he played a hard-up travelling mustache salesman in the improvised kids show, uncle grampa's northern jamboree, and was quite a great hit. it's a good thing he can back up those dashing good looks with jokes and mustache drawings.

button pile.

rent me a dorm room and i will do this to its desk.

so long, citizens.

after such a brief but jam-packed visit to bruno, it came time for us to reassemble ourselves and shove off for edmonton (where i will be performing for ten days).

it was a sad goodbye to our new friends (for me, anyway) but at least we got to do some rabble rousing before our departure. serena has been holding on to an assignment she made (from learning to love you more). the assignment involved making a presentation about an artist and installing it in a public place. serena had made an installation about glen baxter but felt too shy to put it up on the town bulletin board (being one of the new weirdos in town). so when two new weirdos showed up, the time was right to put it up. you will also note that some market weight pigs have become available in the area. so, if you're hungry...







after wrenching ourselves away from bruno, we threw caution to the wind and decided to drive twenty minutes away from edmonton to visit the nearby town of humboldt. this was dumb because i had agreed to perform in a cabaret at 8:00pm in edmonton and we were already going to be cutting it close. but we've just fallen so deep in love with saskatchewan and it's not a place we often have the opportunity to find ourselves. we also heard there was good thifting there.

i'm glad we made the trip. the "humboldt goo neighbo store" was one of those just totally incredible out-in-the-middle-of-nowhere thrift store experiences. i bought a whole bunch of vintage buttons and (this is the crazy part) an avocado flour/sugar/coffee tin set with matching wall-mount paper towel/tin foil/cling wrap dispenser for $2. for the whole set! now just i have to figure out how it is going to get back to toronto.

we also made it to the varscona theatre just in time for the show. we pulled up to the back door, i said some hellos, talked to the tech, got into costume and the show began. and thus it starts anew. goodnight.

all roads lead to bruno.

today our most gracious hosts treated us to a full day of rural tourism. really, we felt profoundly spoiled. i felt particularly treated, because i got to take a day off driving while tyler drove us around to see the sites. endless vistas aside, there are a surprising number of sites. oh, and speaking of driving - this is what boris' headlights looked like by daylight after driving in last night:



boris is the name of our car. he has probably earned a whole blog post, actually, but we can save that for a later date. maybe when we are in boring old vancouver not action-packed bruno...which gets us back to the story at hand.



we started off with a walking tour of bruno, a town that has all a town could need - post office, old-timey hoosgau, convent and western canada's largest dwarf sour cherry orchard. we also ended up getting a tour of the old hardware store (now the home of the family that runs the adjoining grocery) after inquiring about the amazing tin ceilings. as it turns out, these ceilings are in a whole row of buildings on main street. we noticed them in the drug store, too.





after our walk-around, we collected ourselves and then got in the trunk to go visit some important sites in the vicinity on the way to collect on a dinner/visit invitation from tyler's cousin-in-law, wendell.

first we went to a nearby ghost town (or near ghost town - people still live in farm houses there but the town part has been abandoned) called peterson. it seems there are a lot of places like this in rural saskatchewan; small towns that were able to support a few businesses when the grain trade was a little stronger and it was a little harder to get to the bigger towns and visit their growing number of big box stores.





in peterson, tyler also decided to go look in the windows of some old abandoned buildings on main street and then found a wood tick on his neck. more on that later.



after peterson, we went to look at the sawhill buffalo ranch - a ranch built on what used to be some sort of cold war radar base. apparently, the institutional buildings in the distance used to have big white spheres attached to their tops (there were also spheres scattered about the property), which made for quite a site. tyler told us that the ranch owner doesn't allow random people to come look around and take pictures anymore (and who can blame him? it's his home.) tyler also said that the rancher lives in the old curling rink of the base, it being one of the most stable and permanent buildings on the property. it is good to know that the army had their priorities in place when developing bases. i think i mean that honestly.

after that, we made our way to dana, a small hamlet not too far from bruno where serena and tyler first lived when they decided to make the leap from vancouver to saskatchewan. tyler's cousin-in-law (or just cousin; i'm not sure how that works), was pivotal in all of this. it was at wendell's wedding that tyler first visited dana and wendell let tyler and serena stay in his house when they first came out to the prairie.



this is wendell's son, john. he has some sick skateboard moves.



we also discovered that wendell makes little forms out of a substance called orgonite (related to the orgone boxes that william s. burroughs was so fond of sitting in). i had never heard of this wild invention before but it involves taking steel wool, metal shavings, crystals, wire and other whathaveyous and casting them all into molded resin. allegedly, these conglomerates can cleanse a space of bad energy. if you make them big enough, you can also blast a hole through overhead clouds and chem trails from airplanes. or so i am told. we have yet to try any experiments of our own. although serena and i did point these at our foreheads when nobody else was around. if wendell ever makes a new batch of these guys, they will be available at all citizens.

we ended our big day out with a trip to the mysterious totsky overpass. like peterson, totsky is another of these ubiquitous saskatchewan towns-that-aren't. only totsky really isn't there anymore. like at all. well, with the exception of this big concrete overpass that goes over nothing and connects with no roads.



of course, its non-existence doesn't stop totsky from appearing in driving directions, but that's another story. tyler says he's been asking around about the source of this structure and nobody seems to know anything. it seems to have run over train tracks, but this is also a place where train tracks cross the road even in towns. a google search for totsky only yielded one birth record from 1908. from what we could discern at our visit, it seems the overpass is currently being used by grad classes as a place to burn piles of wooden palettes. but it must have had a grander purpose at some point. if you know what that grander purpose was, please let us know.



oh yeah, and when we got home in the evening, tyler discovered he was covered in wood ticks (presumably picked up in peterson). it was a little creepifying and kept me eyeing my moles sideways all night. aitor was the big man and managed to extract the most attached one from tyler's leg. no more spelunking in abandoned buildings for us.

going rural.

today started in a sluggish, belated manner with a repacking of the car and a shop visit to kustom kulture in winnipeg. they are now fully stocked with new sweetie pie buttons and sets for those in winnipeg looking to acquire some. after an obligatory late breakfast at stella's, we finally shoved off into the great wide open of our long drive into saskatchewan.



our destination was the all citizens shop in bruno, saskatchewan, and a visit with its proprietors, serena and tyler. tyler we had met once in passing at an art opening of his in oakville and serena has been my internet pen pal since i contacted her after jen suggested i read her blog, going rural. after reading her blog and finding out about the art/craft shop she ended up opening in bruno, i made sure to get some sweetie pie stuff out to rural saskatchewan to stock their shelves.



we spent most of the remaining daylight driving and rolled into bruno just at the very end of dusk (which is pretty late at this time of year in places this far north). we watched storms pass by, miles and miles to the south of us, and generally marveled at all that big sky this part of the world has going for it.

when we got to bruno, we were greeted by two of the nicest folks a couple of wayfaring hobos could hope to meet. there was much chatting and getting acquainted to do, so we laid into the last of our duty free bourbon and talked about everything under the sun. tomorrow, we are being treated to some wheatland tourism and visits with friends. i can hardly wait.